It is interesting when things happen to us, how we handle them. What questions do we ask? How do we react? How do we feel? How do others view us?
I have found, over the last 3 weeks (yes, Faith is almost 3 weeks old now!! How fast time flies!) that there are so many lessons that I have learned. Some are more subtle and seem small (though they really aren't) and some just jump out at me. This is what jumped at me last night.
We had a meeting with the dr's yesterday. It was a good meeting in my eyes, compared to what we had been going through in the past (2 weeks ago). This meeting was more about where we go from here and how soon we can get Faith home. Like I said, a good meeting.
Faith's occuptaional therapist had talked about her sucking ability, or lack of it. This is the only thing that is keeping her in the hospital now. Everything else is a go and she has improved so much, but she needs to be able to show that she can orally feed. The OT is working with Faith on a daily basis to teach her how, but it is going to be a long process. We don't want her in the hospital for another long stay...so, the dr told us our options. Yup, more decisions...
We could have her home within 2 weeks, but she would need a feeding tube (G-Tube) surgically put into her stomach. We would take her home with a pump and would learn how to use that. This was explained as a backup for Fatih. We would continue to work with her, orally and only use the tube if she is not co-operating with the bottle feeds (or nursing).
So, on the way home, Pete and I talked about the risks involved and how we felt about this new development. At first, the thoughts of 'one tube out, one tube in' came to us and it didn't feel like any progress was going to be made. But, this came to me and I wanted to share it with you all...
The Parable of the Talents, I have never heard this parable used in this way, but it really made sense to me and Pete, when I shared it with him in the car. Here is the parable...
Matthew 25
The Parable of the Talents
14"Again, it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. 15To one he gave five talents of money, to another two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. 16The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. 17So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. 18But the man who had received the one talent went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master's money.
19"After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them. 20The man who had received the five talents brought the other five. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with five talents. See, I have gained five more.'
21"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
22"The man with the two talents also came. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with two talents; see, I have gained two more.'
23"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
24"Then the man who had received the one talent came. 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. 25So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.'
26"His master replied, 'You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? 27Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.
28" 'Take the talent from him and give it to the one who has the ten talents. 29For everyone who has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him. 30And throw that worthless servant outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.'
I have heard this parable taught alongside investing our time and talents and treasures...but never has it hit home like it did last night.
We are given these children...they are not ours, technically, we are just here as a pit stop between being born and being sent. Our kids are here to be trained up in the ways that they should go...when they are older, we let them go and they impact the world in great ways...this is our hope and should be any parents hope. Even though I don't want to let them go, and I would hope that they will want to still know us and enjoy being with us when they are grown, we still, ultimately need to let them go.
So, they are given to us, like the talents in the parable above. Some kids may be 100% healthy but just be a little different, some kids may have more pronounced problems but that doesn't make them any less, it is what we, as parents choose to do with what we have. If Faith comes home with a feeding tube, and that is what she is going to need for the rest of her life, then how are we going to handle that? Are we going to hide her away, dig a hole and bury her (not literally) but 'protect' her from the world and the world from her? Or are we going to invest our time and our love and our hearts and our energy into her life and show her that she is going to go BIG!! That she is going to be able to accomplish many great works...
Feeding tube or not, disability or not, 'normal' or not (and who determines what is 'normal'??) our kids are going to impact the world in many ways, we don't know how right now and we won't until they are out there...but we can definitely mould them and shape them and invest in them...then we will see what the world will reap from their lives as the story continues to be written...
So, what are you teaching your kids? Don't bury them and hide them to protect them from the world, work with them and show them how they can change the world instead. Invest your time in them, show them that they are important and be ready to send them whenever they are called...
I hope this makes sense, it is just one of many lessons that I have learned over the past few weeks...see? Faith is already impacting her mom's life!!
I think getting her home into a more positive atmosphere (and you guys not having to make so many trips)...you'll see her improve faster.
ReplyDeleteInteresting take on the talent story.
I've heard that parable many times, but never thought of it like that. Ruth, what a great insight on parenting. Faith is truly a blessing to you.
ReplyDeletewhat you said " don't bury them and hide them to protect them from the world, work with them and show them how they can change the world instead."
ReplyDeleteWOW
what a statement.... think that is a direct WORD from the Father right there! love it amen sista...preach it!
AMEN!!! Isn't that the truth. Praise God, she is doing so well!
ReplyDeleteWhile the thought of a feeding tube sounds awful, it's not that bad and in the end you get to take her home, which is AWESOME.
That is awesome Ruth. I was thinking along they same lines. God gives them to us to help them grow and to be nurtured(not cuddled). Then when the time comes we release them back to God, so they can also do the work of the ministry. Deffinately a Word from God has been spoken to you.
ReplyDeleteDarlene